On deliberate language
I hate the term "Ethical Non-Monogamy".
Commonly abbreviated to ENM, I saw it around the web a lot a few years ago, but less so as of late, and that is a relief to me. But some folks still seem to be hanging on, and I stumble upon it once in a while...
And can't help but wince.
It's the unnecessary specificity and the allegiance to antithesis.
unnecessary specificity
When you feel the need to specify that what you're doing is Ethical, that implies to me that the default is Not Ethical.
Not Ethical Non-Monogamy is just cheating.
That's all it is.
Might as well just call it "Ethical Cheating".
allegiance to antithesis
As above, so below:
Non-monogamy?
No thanks.
Might as well state that the default is monogamy.
I'll tell you right now, it ain't.
Hell, polygamy is in the Christian Bible.
I wouldn't even be surprised if there was more polygamy than monogamy in the Old Testament.
there's better terminology
Say it with me: polyamory
It's not polygamy, which implies multiple marriages.
It's polyamory: loving multiple people.
No callbacks to ethicalness.
No callbacks to mono... whateverness.
A thing in its own right.
Sufficient.
Leave a comment or continue reading: other Thursday posts or reviewing relationships.
